men we love: andrew lauterstein
August 18th, 2008In posting about my Olympics Boyfriend Ryan Lochte (who I’ll admit has since been kind of forgotten amongst all the Aussie Olympics highs. Worst imaginary girlfriend evs), the lovely Hazy diverted our attentions to a cuter, homegrown and just all-round fucking adorable curly-haired swimmer Andrew Lauterstein. HOW’S THAT FOR A NAME?
pic: ninemsn.com.au
pic: goldcoast.com.au
“We’re going to give the Americans a good shake, hopefully stop Phelpsy from getting his eighth gold.”
I love that he’s taken to calling him Phelpsy. It’s all “bitch I don’t care how many medals and records you have, Ima treat you the same way I do my mates”. So Aus.
best pic ever: abc.net.au
Andypants follows this up by being completely gracious and adorable:
Meanwhile Lauterstein could scarcely believe taking the bronze in such a great race.
“It felt like I was dreaming,” said Lauterstein.
“It was the type of thing I was dreaming about last night. I knew I could be up there fishing for a medal and it is just amazing.
“Words cannot comprehend how I am feeling at the moment.
“It was just a great race to be part of, an absolute spectacle.”
Aww4Eva at him dreaming about being up on the podium (I think he probably meant daydreaming rather than sleepytimes dreaming, but I like the mental image of him curled up in bed, with visions of beating Phelpsy dancing around his head) WHY U SO CUTE ANDREW? Btw you just know Phelps is the type who insists he doesn’t dream. I bet he sleeps in some kind of water chamber like when Casper Van Dien is recovering from battle injury in Starship Troopers.
I think what I find most lovable though is that he posed for Cleo Bachelor of the Year, and kind of hated it:
“But I’m happy for my Cleo Bachelor of the Year run to go under the radar.”
Lauterstein said he found his photos less than flattering. “As soon as anyone touches my curly hair it goes out of control, so I never let anybody touch it, but the makeup lady had her hands going in and out doing the gel and the wax.
“And I got put into a really uncomfortable pose, but I’m not too fussed.”
Truth be told Andrew, that uncomfortable pose is super appreciated around Oh Errol HQ. Except by John John, who got all offended by us looking at another man’s package and promptly upped the amount of dick tricks he performs per day. Also, Sassy verifies that no one knows how to style curly hair. WE UNDERSTAND DARLIN!
We’d also like to point out that he clearly fake tans for big events and forgets to spread evenly in the underarm region:
pic: AFP/Getty Images
In case Andrew’s reading I’d like to point out that we’re not trying to embarrass by pointing this out, merely highlight that WE’VE ALL BEEN THERE. You’re amongst friends. Now take off your shirt and we’ll bronze you up nice and good.
And in case we hadn’t been completely won over, we read this in his Athlete Profile:
Hero/Idol – Anne Lauterstein.
HE PUT HIS MUM AS HIS HERO. Oh Andrew. We love you.
pic: Mark Dadswell/Getty Images
pic: AAP/The Courier-Mail/Nick D’Arcy’s Facebook
kiki
sassy
lozzy
interns
it’s official. I love andy the most of all of your olympic boyfriends.
it’s the face like he’s going to burst out in giggles at phelps singing the anthem that really gets me. HEART.
ps – it IS really hard to style curly hair. I feel ya andy. the number of times I have left the salon looking like shirley temple *shakes fist at the sky*
lolol that foto of him and phelps. he hates the douche too!
ANDY WE LOVE YOU
(and your package)
excellent work lozzy
*grope*
That photo of phelps + andypants is genius. GENIUS.
Great Post!
He is so much hotter and cuter than i ever even realised…
love the picture with ‘I’ll break your nose’ D’arcy
p.s. not only is he a Storm fan (how awesome!) but he played high level AFL and had to choose between the sports!
he is so Melbourne
This article contains little relevance to South Sydney.
There, I said it.
i assume by that you mean ‘yes lozzy you are correct, andrew lauterstein really is a hot bitch’.
Yes, cheers, what was I thinking??? I don’t pack into that team’s scrum, but I will say he sounds more like a beer than an olympic swimmer.
lol at the photo from Nick D’arcy’s facebook… don’t you love these well known athletes that don’t know how to adjust their priavcy settings?
Great blog!!
I tots love Andy too! So gorgeous, and that body – DAYUM!!!
who wouldn’t want to snuggle up with him on a cold (or hot for that matter) night…. its the stuff dreams are made of
I had a super vivid sex dream about Andy last night. It was AWESOME. It culminated in him falling asleep, face down, naked on a cliff face.
BEST DREAM EVER. I thank you for this Lozzy.
I can’t believe you lot haven’t all had serius crushes on the one, the only, the big man on the small bike…Kamikazi.
First of all, he’s unconventional (or just stupid) by not only changing his name legally by deed poll to his nickname, but also misspelling it.
Plus he doesn’t change his socks. As if that isn’t the most sexually attractive thing you’ve ever heard.
And by misspelling serious, I have also achieved Kamikazi cool.
EMMA I AM SO JEAL *cries* ahhh naked on a cliff face *orgasms*