Men we love: Taylor Hanson*
June 23rd, 2008*and by ‘we’ I mean me, Kiki and Sassy. Jessica will have no part in this, and I think Emma might hold the same opinion. Also I feel odd referring to him as a man coz lord knows he barely is one but whatevs.
I love Hanson. Yep, I do. I was obsessed with them back in ’97 like every other 13 year old girl back then, but lost my way in about 1999 when I switched my Taylor love for Mark Hoppus (wtf?) and Pacey of Dawson’s Creek fame (I may have expressed this by shouting “I Love Paceeeeeeey” from the top of the Tower of Terror at Dreamworld, but I digress). Kiki on the other hand is fiercely loyal and has unashamedly held onto her HanLove for the whole 11 years. And once again under her influence – I am easily lead in case you haven’t noticed – I got back on the HanTrain (how many times do you think I can refer to Han’something’ in this post? Place your bets ppl).
It’s pretty clear why TayTay is a Man We Love, but I’ll put it in bullet points anyway:
- He completely overtakes the label of ‘hot bitch’ and moves straight on into ‘completely fucking angelically beautiful’. There’s actually not even words for that level of beauty.
- He always writes/sings the best songs on the album. This is a fact. The non-Tay songs are always crap.
- His singing voice is perfect and he loves a moan or twenty in between lyrics. Ohhhh oooooh *thrust*
- He loves an accessory, especially scarves and necklaces. He clearly loves his necklaces more than literally anything in the world.
- He has no idea how deeply uncool he is and it’s totally endearing. In this interview they told this bullshit roundabout ~RockStar~ story about how they snuck Zac in some club (but in the end I don’t think they actually snuck him in. This is how far they have to stretch for a badass musician story) where they were hanging out with COLIN from RADIOHEAD. Did you hear that guys? They know COLIN from RADIOHEAD. Oh Taylor. There’s this other quote too which the Internets have failed me in delivering again but I swear it’s true, where he’s all “we want all kinds of people to love our music – soccer moms, Metallica fans…DON’T YOU KNOW WE KICK ASS?”
- Because he can’t do anything normal. Over at The New Way they have an ongoing list of Things Taylor Hanson Can’t Do, which I guarantee is full of lolz even for people who don’t know why it’s funny.
- Because of this part in the HanDoco Strong Enough To Break where he, in all seriousness, tells Isaac to “take the pickle out of his doody”. Or possibly booty. Either way it’s hilar. This probably could’ve gone in the ‘because he has no idea of how uncool he is’ point but I think it needs it’s own. Also, please note that this is Jessica’s one and only favourite HanMoment.
- He dances like a fool/white guy.
- He gets drunk, poses with random girls/bottles of vodka WHO AREN’T HIS WIFE and allows people to take photos of it for our benefit. THANKS TAYLOR!
kiki
sassy
lozzy
interns
